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Thought I’d take a few pictures and let people get to know the “work environment” that I’m plugging away at.

This is the view from the doorway, you can see the couch I’ve started sleeping on the last few days and the desk hiding away to the right back there.

The desk… well actually it’s a table, but I like to call it a desk. Makes it sound more official.

Of course I use the space to draw copious amounts of concept art…

And other equally important things.

Good news is, I always have my drafting table to fall back on. Even if it is missing the screws to allow it to tilt up.

The work environment is treating me well so far. The boss is a neurotic bitch though. ~.^

(Haven’t decided on a title yet.)

Presently I’m working on a platformer. I went ahead and spent a hundred bucks on the Torque Game Builder, so far it’s looking like money well spent. TGB comes with a nice set of basic tools that have allowed me to get the basics up pretty fast, also the scripting language is based on C# syntax so I’ve found it rather intuitive so far.

I knew before I began that I was going to be using 2d art. 3d is great for certain things, but I just don’t have the time and money to make a something in 3d that looks good and moves fluidly. The major sticking point of pixel art though is that you have to draw every frame yourself, so for now I’m focusing on trying to build a unified style.

The main character has been slowly evolving.

Some shots of the game I have running at the moment.

Anyways, the script isn’t coming along as fast as I want. Still I do have a general direction for it to go.

I’ve been drafting and redrafting this in my mind. Over and over I’ve sat down to write it, but it always kept coming up too emo. Today, a little piece of the puzzle finally fell into place though.

I quit my job a couple days ago, well actually I quite over two weeks ago but the date on my notice was up Saturday night. While I’m living at home I’m going to focus in on my art and development skills, try and get a game or two actually built and generating revenue. I’ve built within my head a lot of resistance to this path, going over major concerns bit by bit and building many solid arguments as to why not to do it. But at the end of the day my impulsive side won out, as it often does, and here I am with a whole lot of time on my hands.

I can’t really say that I’m sure this will work out, a single person working on their home computer hasn’t been a particularly successful business model for a while now. On the other hand though, what I can say is why I’m doing it, and why it has to be done this way.

This blog post was written many months ago. I wish I could say that was a down point in my life, but for about four years prior to that and to this day I’ve been stuck in a pretty bad fight with depression. Right now I’m on a high, I don’t consider suicide every day! What always kept me alive through the lows though was a couple things, first, I hate pain, second, it wasn’t my right to inflict that much pain on everyone around me.

I’m the last to make friends and the quickest to cut and run from those relationships… hell I’m not sure I honestly know the meaning of the word friend, perhaps they were all just passing acquaintances. In some strange twist of life though, I live for other people. It used to be what got me from one minute to the other, knowing that I had people left to live for right then that second. My whole decision making rationale is based on how it’ll help or effect others.

There are entire worlds and societies that live inside my mind, growing and evolving, shifting and blending. I’m not sure when exactly, but eventually I came to the decision that that was my purpose for being. My reason to exist, to open up those worlds for others to see and explore, for someone else to escape into even if only for a short time. The problem with working for EA or any other big name company then, is that I won’t be creating those worlds. I’ll be creating their worlds and their marketing departments latest pet project worlds. Sure I could probably just consider it deferred living, but why would I want to spend any time not contributing to my reason for existence?

So I guess you can consider this the figurative opening of my own company; even if the literal opening will be some time in the future, near or far. Oh and you don’t have to worry about EA or ActiBliztrosity buying me out. I’ve thought long and hard about those possibilities, and honestly my soul isn’t worth the money, besides, it doesn’t belong to me.

Its already been signed away to all of you.

- Sara
Amateur Desktop Philosopher